105.The Honolulu Baby Karaoke Club

While our family was growing, Mr. Binky was on his way to a karaoke. He had never been to one before and was not sure it was a good idea he should be seen there. But a Prime Minister has to go wherever needed. However, though it was dead night, but he felt he should be wearing dark glasses.

 “Yes,” he thought. “Definitely. Like those on the sun.” He meant a plastic sun that was dancing among palm-trees in the colourful headboard of the “Honolulu Baby Karaoke and Hawaiian Bar,” club he was about to enter.

Deep down he was really a very shy person, and if he hadn’t been told it would be really worth his while to show up there, he never would have.But it was freezing ouside so it didn’t take him much longer to pop in.

Once inside, Mr. Binky saw that he was in a different part of the world. It was summer in there, or better yet, the temperature of Paradise. Everybody there was wearing Hawaiian shirts or skirts and leis. He felt out of place in his grey suit until a lady in a hula skirt with a huge red hibiscus in her hair put a lei round his neck and the frangipani flowers made him feel a little more at home as he was escorted to a round table where Minafer Ominous and Gemaniah Worrywart waited sipping Hawaiian punch and eating pineapple sherbet.

“You are going to love this,” said Minafer. “We have your Christmas gift from the Magi and you are about to receive it.”

  

“What?” said Mr. Binky. “I don’t understand.”

“The Magi left your gift under our tree next to our shoes," explained Gem. "They couldn’t put it in your shoes because they didn’t have your address. You haven’t been on their list for years, because it was years since you last wrote them. And they misplaced the envelope with your return address on it because of all the fuss about the blank check affair.”

“You got my gift on the sixth of January and you are giving it to me on Valentine’s Day?”

“Well, you love your job, don’t you?” said Minafer.  

“Our gift was a trip to Hawaii,” explained Gemaniah. “We’ve been there for a while. As soon as we got back, we opened this club and then we called you.”

“I can’t believe this! The Magi actually listened to me and left me a blank check?”

“Oh, no. Not exactly. I don’t think they will be giving out blank checks for a while. So it’s not exactly that, but the gift will serve your purpose.”

“Well, what is it, then?”

“They’ve left you a phone number. Mrs. Parry’s to be exact.”

“But I already have that madwoman’s phone number!” exclaimed Mr. Binky in surprise. “Oh. Oh, I shouldn’t have said that. I meant that grand old lady’s number. You see, she happens to be my grandfather’s great aunt and I know her very well. Of course, there is no fairy she isn’t related to.”

Gemaniah urged Mr. Binky to use the phone number. He was to tell Fairyland’s Grandmother all about his plans for the future.

“But she is a reactionary of the first water. She trembles like an aspen leaf when she hears the word  ‘future’ and then throws seven times seven fits in a row.”

Gemaniah explained patiently that Mr. Binky could use that to his advantage. There was nothing easier to control than people who would control everything. If Mrs. Parry was already afraid of the future, half the prime minister’s work was done. All he had to do was explain how useful it would be to her to aid him in controlling what was to come. Mr. Binky’s school was meant to avoid the future’s being as horrid as it looked like it would be should it be left to itself. 

“What you are saying does make some sense,” said Mr. Binky. “I hope it will make sense to her too.”

“Two last things before you go,” said Minafer. “First, tell Oberon not to worry about his new daughter. She’s a true fairy and will grow up tp make him and Titania proud of her. And the other thing is that the owner of this place, who happens to be me, never allows a VIP guest to leave without his having sung our karaoke’s theme song.”

And Mr. Binky had to go on stage and sing ‘Honolulu Baby’ surrounded by lovely ladies in hulas strumming on ukuleles. Considering he was neither a pro nor an amateur , he didn’t do too badly.

                         

The next morning he phoned the great Mrs. Parry and to his surprise she said she knew exactly what she could do to help him. She would let him know by messenger pigeon as soon as she had the money for his school. Though she had a phone, she hated using it, so she wouldn’t call.The noisy artifact made her very, very nervous. She only had it because her son Henny insisted on it. He said she would want to know at once if a confounded car hit him. How could she say no? The prime minister couldn’t begin to imagine how glad she was that the call was his instead of due to that dismal motive.