341. Limpy

341. Limpy

“Thank you all for making so much noise. I couldn’t concentrate on sleeping. That made me come out. I know this will sound strange,” said Umbrian, a little timidly for someone as brash as he was known to be, “but I need to be alone. Of course, I’ve been alone for centuries, but it’s not that kind of alone I need. I mean I need to reinsert myself in society slowly. I’m glad to see you all, and grateful you saved me from further centuries of nothingness. But…I need time to think. As for Fancy, I heard her say she would rather not speak to me, and the truth is I prefer it that way too. Poor thing. May she recover soon.”

“Just stick him in the beach house in Venice with a pair of servants so he can be by himself there without anyone stressing him, Papa,” said Henny to Ambivolo.

“That would be nice,” said Umbrian. 

And Ambivolo agreed not to barge in on his newly returned son and to not put pressure on him so he would recover quickly.

“And as for us, I think you three kids have done enough do-gooding to see how complicated it can be. Do you still want to be do-gooders, Azuline and Esmeraldo? What have you learned from this?”

“That you have to be careful when dispensing medicines to humans. You can’t give them just the first thing you find,” said Esmeraldo. “That’s the main cause of all this fuss.”

“The detonator,” nodded Gentlerain.

“I haven’t been asked, because I’m not going into do-gooding, but I’ve learned you have to be careful when choosing your love interests,”said Neferclari.

“Very careful, indeed,” said Uncle Gentie.”It’s one of the most important decisions in life, choosing who you mean to share it with.”

“I have learned we might have to deal with disagreeable people,” said Azuline, “and dangerous ones too.”

“Unfortunately. All sound lessons. All spell out CAUTION. And to avoid confrontations with evil, I suggest you start by doing little good actions right here on the island and not something as complicated as helping Fancy has been. Right now I suggest you forget about all this  for a while and start thinking of celebrating Halloween.”

And we did. All but the Bluebell Twins. I took Neferclari to Castle Attor and Uncle Rich left with his two kids. Uncle Brightfire, Ambivolo and Henny left together, while Umbrian went off to his family’s beach house with Quiver, while Shiver stayed behind so there would be someone at the dolmen when Fancy woke.  But the Blue twins still had work to do, according to their father.

“Oh, no. Not you, ladies,” said Gentlerain to his daughters. “No thinking of elaborate costumes yet. There’s amends to be made first. For unlawful use of love dust.”

“What?” cried the Blue Twins. “We’ve been with you throughout all this, and Umbrian isn’t angry with us. He laughed when he heard we’d powdered him.”

“There’s Fancy, who´s probably had the worst part in all this.”

“But she was already secretly in love with him! From the very start and prior to our intervention. All we did was enhance her chances. And she’s a good person. Surely she won’t hold this against us!” argued Belinda.

“We’ve still one person to see to,” said Gentie. “You aren’t responsible for her at all, but I think the least you can do for Umbrian and Fancy is get Malina Badlight out of their way.”

“She’s stuck in a pea! What can she do to them?”

“She bounced and rolled all the way from the bar where she was coalpead to Granny Grimface’s to confront Fancy. She’s not exactly helpless. And, oh, is she determined!”

“Are you sure about that? Someone may have taken her there.”

“I am sure about everything. I have been all along. I just wanted this affair to unravel slowly so your cousins and niece would learn things from it.”

“But you’ve got Malina safely put away in a jar!” protested Arabella.

“I can’t leave her there. It would be mean of me.”

“But she attempted to coalpea Fancy!” cried both girls.

“Yes, that’s criminal. But I believe that if she finds someone that can make her happier than Umbrian she might forget about harming Fancy. That’s where you girls come in!”

“Ahhhhh!” sighed the twins, now interested in what their father had to say.

“We’ll find her a fitting lover. Yes, us. Not just you,” said Gentlerain, “I have to approve of your choice before you employ the love dust. That way the responsibility will be mine.”

“We’ll do it,” said Arabella and Belinda in unison. They were already giggling and hopping with anticipation. That’s how much they liked their profession.

“But we won’t find her someone just anywhere. We´ll do that in Hell itself, because that’s where she belongs. Which is why I am supervising this arrangement.”

Gentlerain took the girls to his office. At first it looked almost empty, very minimal and rather Japanese, but when he snapped his fingers, it suddenly expanded and  became crowded with unending tons of bookcases and archives and stands with odd stuff on them and more. Gen took an enormous book from a shelf, one very difficult to handle.

“Maybe we can find someone in here.”

Who is Who in Hell ? was the title of the book.

He set the book on a meeting table and opened it in half.

“We won’t have to study all that book, will we?” sighed Arabella.

“I think we’ll narrow it down by directly consulting Limpy,” he said.

“Who?”

"Our infernal documentalist."

Gentlerain went to the odd stuff stands and took hold of an unstoppered red glass bottle.

“Are you at home, Limpy?” he said.

The bottle began to shake and a mist started to rise from it. The mist moved aside and next materialized into a devil,  dressed in red, with horns and a pointed tail and black wings. But, instead of bearing a fork, he leaned on crutches.

“Hi!” said the apparition. “You are his daughters. You’re very pretty girls. Nice to meet you, Belinda and Arabella. Your pa isn’t making a mistake introducing  you to someone unsuitable. I’m not all that bad for a devil. Only a little silly.”

He did not add like you.